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Monday, February 9, 2009

Another Anniversary

Three years ago today I went inpatient.

I left my room twice in 41 days and only then for Dr's
appointments within the hospital
but the hardest day was my first day home without them.

It was the most terrifying time in my life.

I would do it again in a heart beat.

I have had a knot in my stomach all week just nearing this anniversary.

I thought this year would have gotten easier with all the memories that go along with that pregnancy but they haven't.

I am so thankful for my girls.

I am so thankful.

9 comments:

Casey's trio said...

Strange how those old feelings come flooding right back...

Octamom said...

So thankful with you! They are so beautiful!

Blessings!

Cecily R said...

I'll echo Octamom and be so thankful with you! My sister did 6 weeks of inpatient with her first and has similar feelings...what amazing moms you are!

Jaime said...

So, so thankful. Love this post!

angie said...

I think it's probably something that will never leave you. Maybe with time not be so vivid, but it's still such a defining part of who I am!

Laura said...

I think every year I love my girls more so every year the reality and fears I felt of their possible loss is even more horrible. I just cannot bear the thought of not having them with me now. The joy and the happiness is certainly a part of the stress and pain it took to get them here. I'll never forget or stop feeling grateful! Some things change you for the better, this did me. Never want to ever go through something like that again, though. LOL!

You are a great Mom.

I am Arizona; a person, not a place. said...

I second Angie...I don't think it ever leaves you. I celebrated my second "Inpatient Day" anniversary this past December and I remember having a knot in my stomach as well. I'd never want to do it again, but I would. :)

Cookie said...

Ugh! I know what you mean. THe hardest thing for me was to go home after having my baby and not taking the baby with me. And people seeing me out of the hospital and asking, "where's the baby?" I still cry when I think about it. And that was almost 7 years ago! Ok, now I feel old :S

Stephanie said...

Ditto what everyone has said. My 2 yr. was hard...I think mostly now b/c we're able to look at these miracles and love them beyond words. I know for me that reality really shows me how naive and pretty much in denial I was while inpatient. I can not imagine my life without this experience. (and I've met some amazing women along the way :) )